The Prodigal Daughter Returns

I have sick kids today.  It's only the second day of school.  URGH!!!  Being that I committed to allowing God to work all things in our life instead of griping and trying to control things, I am running with it.  This is one of the reasons I have scheduled us for 4 days of intense work and one day of art, music, etc.  We'll just make up what we can on Friday.  My well kids are working through school so they will either get a day off on Friday OR if they end of sick, they won't fall behind either.  


As I have been working, I have been thinking about a quote that I read yesterday by Nancy Leigh DeMoss.  

 Do you ever get tired of serving others? Maybe picking up after your kids has become a chore. Or maybe you’re caring for an elderly parent who doesn’t seem to appreciate it. Can I encourage you? You’re never more like Jesus than when you surrender your own rights and take the role of a servant.

It worked beautifully into living out what I wrote in another post under my "Don't Waste Your Life" category.  It was called "Making the Most of Your Time".  I challenged the reader to consider not just that being at home was enough.  We must consider how we're using even our time at home.  How much computer?  How much TV?  How much pleasure reading?  Then this quote showed up and pierced me further.  


I have been considering how I am not surrendering my own rights.  I haven't liked what I am finding.


I am addicted to the computer.  I LOVE to research different things I am learning.  I have blogs that cover some of those things, particularly the real foods diet I am seeking to learn about to serve my family.  I have a few blogs that encourage me as a wife and mom.  And then there is Facebook.  Underdog said last night that he no longer understands the point.  I had to be honest, I have wondered that since I first signed up.  What purpose does it serve?  I know, I know.  We can catch up with old friends.  We can keep tabs of the latest happenings with our closer friends.  Even family can keep up with each other.  But I wonder if this has just become another means for the enemy to draw people away from each other.  Whether it's a mom spending too much time checking FB or posting (ME!!!!) or simply people who are uncomfortable actually picking up a phone and making a phone call (ME!!!!!!), FB offers us excuses not to relate as human beings on a level that I believe the Creator intended for us. 


People need intimacy with each other.  FB offers a false intimacy.  Even blogs can do that too. 
This false intimacy makes me think that I know friends and all about them.  Friends I haven't seen in nearly 20 years post about their children and their work andit  some how it makes me think that I know them personally.  It's easy to think I really know someone at church because of what they are posting on FB.  I recently found out a friend of mine with the most upbeat posts is having a really hard time in a new life situation.  But I have been content just reading her post than connecting with her through a phone call.  


Another area of illusion in intimacy that certain aspects of the internet can mimic is our walk with Jesus.  How many times I have posted links to challenging blogs or have clicked on other links and then felt "good" about myself or somehow felt convicted by what I read.  I do this alot.  And often I am too foolish to realize that I have spent more time being convicted by the words of human beings than by the very Word of God.  These have created the illusion that just because I am convicted it means that I am knowing Jesus through them.   FB, blogs, even some of the "Christian" books that I read had made it easy to think I am seeking the Lord and that I know Him.  Sure, I can glean wisdom from certain aspects of each of these.  But is this really intimacy with the Father?  I once read somewhere that people think they have gained a tremendous amount of knowledge about certain subjects simply by watching the evening news or reading news magazines.  Just as the nightly news and news magazines offer us tidbits of information and give us the illusion that we know alot, FB, blogs, and Christian books create the illusion that we know the Father.  But really there is only one way to truly know the Father. . .that is through the Son.  

All things have been handed over to me by my Father, and no one knows the Son except the Father, and no one knows the Father except the Son and anyone to whom the Son chooses to reveal him.  (Matthew 11:27)

 If you had known me, you would have known my Father also. From now on you do know him and have seen him.” (John 14:7)

When we know the Word, we know the Son.  

In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. . .And the Word became flesh and dwelt among us, and we have seen his glory, glory as of the only Son from the Father, full of grace and truth.  (John 1:1,14)

As I have evaluated my own life, I have come to realize that I have felt an emptiness on my heart for a long time.  For a while I blamed it on a bad attitude about being pregnant when I didn't want to be.  Then I blamed it on being overwhelmed with a new baby.  Recently it's been easy to blame it on not feeling well as I dealing with this pinched nerve in my back.  The reality is that my priorities are off. . .WAY off.  I am putting my time toward good things and the rest is going toward meaningless things.  In the process, I have forgotten my Savior.  I have forgotten what He has done for me.  I have been missing His call to me to come to Him.  And truth be told, I miss my Savior.  


As I was folding laundry a while ago, I was praying for the courage to do what I don't want to do.  It's time to get off Facebook completely.  I have done it once before but went back when I was on bedrest and "bored" just lying around.  It doesn't serve much of a purpose for me anymore though.  It started as a means of passing time away. . .now it's become a means of wasting time.  I have so much about homemaking that I want to learn right now.  I feel so drawn to getting back to some of the old fashioned ways of keeping a home.  I LOVE cooking from scratch but have found that I "forget" or get behind so I don't get to.  Why?  Often it's because I have been on FB or reading blogs.  This definitely doesn't lend itself to making the most of my time NOR does it make much of Jesus.  


I miss my Savior.  I miss seeking Him wholeheartedly.  I miss the joy that used to come with that.  I miss the peace that passes all understanding as I walked along with Him.  I am going home.  The prodigal returns with a humble heart as she's realized and laments the time she's wasting pursuing something that in the end will only lead to death.  And as I post this on Facebook I hope to cause others to think about this.  I know it will probably be offensive.  So be it.  But I do challenge those reading to consider the WHY of Facebook.  What purpose does this serve in our lives?  And remember how we did actually survive without it 5, 10, and 20 years ago.  


One final comment, I am not demonizing the computer or the internet (at least not in this post.  HA!!!).  Both can either be used for good or evil.  I suppose the same can be said for Facebook.  But if you have evaluated you life and found that Facebook is truly being used to glorify God and your time is being used to bring Him glory, then there is nothing to fear.  But I have found that on a personal level, I am not doing this.  I spend more time trying to glorify myself with my comments.  Sometimes I fall into the sin of gossip as a share things about my children that might embarrass them if they knew I had posted it.  I will be spending the next few days collecting emails and contact information for those friends that I know I want to keep track of.  For those of you that I don't, it's been so nice catching up with you all.  I pray God's grace in your life.  


This weekend I be completely eliminating my account.  At least I will attempt to do so.  At the very least I'll be changing my password so that I don't have access to it.  This doesn't often work as well because it's easy to retrieve it and change it.  But I'll try what I can.  


God Bless and thank you for reading.